


What, are we in Forks?

by Jsscshvlr



Series: It's immortality, darling. [2]
Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Immortality, Light Angst with a Happy Ending, May is mentioned - Freeform, Vampire!MJ, we love her here
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-08 18:22:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27311119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jsscshvlr/pseuds/Jsscshvlr
Summary: He won’t understand the gravity of her words. That when she says she wants to love him forever, she means it. Not for the next 70 years. Forever. How do you ask someone if that’s what they want? Knowing that most people wouldn’t choose this life. Bound to sleeping while everyone is living. Only coming to life when everything is dark.
Relationships: Michelle Jones/Peter Parker
Series: It's immortality, darling. [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1993975
Comments: 18
Kudos: 37





	What, are we in Forks?

He won’t understand the gravity of her words. That when she says she wants to love him forever, she means it. Not for the next 70 years. Forever. How do you ask someone if that’s what they want? Knowing that most people wouldn’t choose this life. Bound to sleeping while everyone is living. Only coming to life when everything is dark. 

She’s also terrified. It’s unfair, she knows this. But what if she brought up the fact that he could be immortal with her, and he said no. Deep down she knows it won’t be because of her. It’s because he’s a good person. The best kind of person. So there’s no way he’d be okay drinking blood to survive. Hurting people. Even if she keeps it to the bad guys, the ones she stops from hurting people. She knows it will kill him to say no, so she doesn’t mention it. She doesn’t think her heart could take it. It hasn’t beaten in over 659 years, but still. She knows he loves her. She definitely loves him. That’s enough, it needs to be enough. 

It’s not the first time she’s ever been in love, but she does try to stray away from meaningful relationships. It’s pretty hard to keep anyone around when you casually slip out that you need to murder people to survive. Vampires should have rights ya know. 

Mainly, she just cannot fathom going through the heartbreak again. When they leave because they’re 40 now and she doesn’t look a day over 23. When they decide they want children. When they die. She’s not sure if she can deal with that, not with Peter. Peter who already knows she’s a vampire, thinks she’s the _“coolest person in the world MJ”_. Figured it out early, he claims when they met at the bar but she thinks he’s lying. She figured out he was Spiderman before he even saw her though, so she’s still winning. 

But he’s unquestionably good, and he’s ridiculously kind and she loves him. Wants to spend the rest of her life with him. The prospect that she’d never have to be alone again weighs on her mind on an almost minutely basis. If she’s being honest, being alone for the rest of time never bothered her. She likes to be alone. But then she met Peter. Who makes her feel more alive than she did before she turned. Who makes her remember what it feels like to truly live. 

She doesn’t want his spark to dull, doesn’t think there’s a chance it will. But what if? What if she asks to turn him, and because he’s eager to please her, he doesn’t take the time to think about it, and then he regrets it? She would barely survive the heartbreak of him dying, but the thought that he could hate her, resent her? It’s too much. So she doesn’t ask. Won’t bring it up. They’ll have as many years together as he wants. He can have whatever he wants from her. She’d give him her heart if she had one. 

* * *

He’s in Michelle’s bedroom working on some secret plans. It’s safest to work here during the day because MJ sleeps like the dead, because, well she is. He likes to work here because he can still feel her presence, he misses her during the day. He was already taking online classes because of Spiderman so his schedule is pretty malleable, and although he’s borderline swapped everything around so he’s awake when she is, sometimes he has to sneak in some planning. 

She can’t find out what he’s working on until he’s sure it will work. Trying to make a blood substitute for her, and other vampires, assuming there’s more, is not as easy as making web fluid, who knew? He’s optimistic that it’s going to make her life easier. Hopefully, she won’t have to continue killing people when his blood is no longer available to her. It’s not that he thinks he’s going to die soon, just that, he’s kinda hopeful he’ll stop living. At some point. Soon. With her. He’s just got to find a segway in conversation to bring it up.

“Oh hey MJ, I don’t want to live without you. Please turn me.”

“Hello, Michelle, would you please do me the honour of turning me into a vampire so I can live without the fear of dying and leaving you.”

So he’s brainstormed with Ned. Sue him. The issue is, all of it sounds so dramatic. Sure, you can tell someone you’d die for them and it’s all, “aww thanks”. But in practice? He may as well pull his heart out of his chest and present it to her. He would, you know if she wanted him too. But whatever. He’s in love with her. That was obvious the second she winked at him. 

How does he even ask her that? She’s been alive for 659 years. God, she’s the coolest person he’s ever going to meet. Why has he swooped in here thinking he’s God’s gift and she’s going to want to spend eternity with him? Please. He gets irrationally jealous about all the people she must have fallen in love with when he was nowhere near existence. It’s silly, he knows it is. But he’s so in love with her. Wants to know everything about her, knowing that understanding someone like Michelle can’t be done in a lifetime as short as his. 

He’s spoken to Ned about this, he’s spoken to May, he’s tried to speak to Tony, the only person left to talk to is Michelle. He’s nervous about asking her. She loves him, he knows that. He knows if she says no that it will be okay. They’ll be okay. He just has to ask her. 

All he wants is to give her his heart, it’ll be okay.

* * *

“Oh, Pete. I know it feels like the worst thing now, but it’ll pass.”

“It’s going to hurt forever,” he says, wiping his nose with his jumper sleeve. It’s Michelle’s and it makes everything worse but he can’t take it off. Not while it still smells like her. Probably not ever.

“Forever is a very long time, honey.”

He knows that, but God he wants that with her. Even if he can’t have forever, he’ll take anything. He’s not entirely sure how he's supposed to go through the rest of his life knowing she’s there. Wondering if she’s forgotten him. Knowing he’ll never forget the way she laughed with her whole chest when she was well-rested, or when she cried telling him about how she can’t remember her parents or the way she held onto him as she described her transition. 

“Yeah, and I want to spend it with Michelle but she doesn’t love me like that. I should never have asked. I just - I want to spend my life with her, why doesn’t she want that for her too? Why doesn’t she love me like that?” he knows he’s being unreasonable, that she looked just as broken as he feels. Like this was the worst thing she ever had to do. 

“That’s not fair, Pete,” May says. “You know she loves you. She loves you enough to not ask you to become a vampire for her. What if you want children, huh?” he bitterly mutters something about them not having her sarcasm or her heart or her loyalty and how he doesn’t want them without her anyway. “What if you want to grow past 26? She doesn’t want that for you. Don’t make this harder on her okay?”

“I just - I shouldn’t have asked. And then at least I’d have had a lifetime with her. I got too pushy. But you haven’t met her yet, so you don’t understand. Oh my God, you’re not even going to get to _meet_ her May.”

She won’t see the way she loves him, so easily and freely. She won’t see the way he lights up the second she’s around. She won’t see how unreasonably happy she makes him simply by breathing. She won’t get to meet the love of his life and the thought would bring him to his knees if he had got off the couch in the last 48 hours. 

“Pete, it’s going to be okay. I was like this when we lost Ben. It gets better. I promise. It gets better.”

He doesn’t want it to get better, he wants her. 

“I miss her so much, May,” he says leaning into her so she’ll hug him. Remembering the way Michelle hugged him for the last time, whispering that he’ll be okay. That he’ll forget about the pain and the heartbreak. That he’ll forget about her. That it’ll be okay.

“It’ll pass-” she places a kiss to the top of his head “-It’ll pass.”

* * *

She finds out the way all monumentally heartbreaking news seems to be delivered these days, via Twitter. She reads headline after headline, 

“Spider-man dead”

And she can’t breathe. 

She can’t remember what it feels like to have a heart, but she remembers how it feels when it breaks. All she can feel is pain, the ache which grips on every one of her useless organs. She knew it would kill her when Peter left her, but she thought she’d have more time to prepare. As if it’s something you can study for. But so soon? She only just saw him. Heard his heart beating. Heard his pleas not to leave him, that he didn’t need to be immortal if she didn’t want but he still wanted her. She muffles a scream into her palm in a futile attempt at getting rid of some of the agony. But it only makes it worse. Her non-existent heart feels like it’s fallen to her feet. She wants him here, she _needs_ him here. He wanted to be here with her. If she’d turned him he’d still be alive. 

It’s not supposed to be over. She shouldn’t have the power to decide who lives and who dies.

But _God,_ she can’t believe she was so selfish. So he might hate her for the rest of time, but he’d _be_ here. The world would get Peter Parker, the world desperately needs him. She can feel the pit of darkness she’s about to let herself fall into but she can’t pull herself up. Doesn’t want to. Doesn’t deserve to. Let it encase her. She doesn’t want to be here anyway, not in a world where he doesn’t exist. 

Her phone ringing startles her and she goes to turn it off but it’s Peter. It can’t be.

“Pete?!”

“No-” _no._ “-sorry, it’s May Parker. I’m Peter’s aunt.”

“Oh-” she’s not sure what to say. She knows May knows he’s Spiderman, assumes she saw the news, but how do you comfort someone when you’re breaking as well?

“He’s at the Tower, I’m going over now if you want me to pick you up?” Not to be mean, but May seems vaguely chill for someone whose nephew is dead. 

“What- to like- sorry, what do you need me for?” She’s seen her fair share of dead bodies and she’s not about to add Peter to that list. She wants to remember him bright and happy and full of life. She wanted longer to know him, so she’d have a chance at remembering him for longer. 

“Oh, I just - look. I know you broke up and I respect your decision of course. But I thought you might want to see him, he’ll definitely want to see you. And I’m being a bit selfish because I know you mean the world to him and I think you’ll help his recovery, so do you think you could come with me?”

MJ’s pretty sure she blacked out.

“He’s not dead?” she croaks out.

“Oh sweetie, no-” she hears a borderline growl on the other end of the phone “-Those bastard tabloids. I’m on my way okay?”

“Yes.” May hangs up and MJ remembers she’s not entirely sure May knows where she lives, or that she’s a vampire. Huh. It’s fine, she can hide her teeth she’s pretty sure. She’s been too depressed since the break up that she hasn’t eaten. Also, the slight issue that she started to depend on Peter for her food and now she has that sickly feeling about feeding on someone else. Not when Peter made it so clear what it meant to him. She goes to throw on something clean and brush her teeth, it’s the best she can do given the time frame and lingering heartbreak. 

May picks her up with a guy named Happy, and she promptly pretends to fall asleep in the back of the car. She’s been avoiding meeting May for months at this point because of the way Peter talks about her. She’s not sure she can deal with someone else to lose in this relationship. She’s also terrified that May won’t approve, knowing that Peter is Spider-man but a vampire might be too far. She knows Peter talks to May about her, and recently if she knows about the break-up. Does she know why? Does she know she’s trying to spare him? Does she know she’s heartbroken too?

Walking into the Avenger’s Tower is daunting, but like, she’s almost 700 years old so she’s not _scared._ Not of the Avengers, ew. She’s a vampire, Peter thinks she’s the coolest thing to ever exist. He’s correct. It’s just a big trip to go and see all of your ex-boyfriends family at the same time. If they know who she is, they won’t like her. She broke his heart. He had to almost die for her to come to see him. But she is here, and he’s here. So she’s going to see him. 

Turning the corner she sees a waiting room full of people. She doesn’t like rooms full of people. She doesn’t know enough alive people to count on one hand, let alone have them stand around waiting for you to sit up. She should introduce herself but how do you say, “hi, I’m Michelle. In love with your son or friend or whatever, broke up with him though because he wants to be a vampire like me”? 

“Michelle, it’s nice to meet you, I’m Tony.” Yeah no shit. But weird. She must not be hiding her confusion well, because he follows up with, “The kid talks about you all the time. Can you believe he thinks you’re cooler than me? So rude. Nice fangs though, you’ve got me there.”

“Hi, you as well.” She tries to keep the talking to a minimum because she’s exhausted and starving and she misses Peter.

“Do you need anything? Water? Food?” God she’s hungry. She hasn’t eaten human food in over 500 years (a random bet which she regrets) but it might help ease the ache. 

“Er-”

“Em?” Peter. His voice is nowhere near as subdued as she was expecting, he sounds almost excited. With wide eyes and a purpose, she walks to his room, which annoyingly appears to be part of the waiting room. Awkward. 

“It is you! I knew I could hear you. Hi.” Peter says sitting up and staring at her like she’s his entire world like he wants to spend forever with her. She thought he was dead. And here he is. And she can’t move. 

“Hi.”

“Hi. Stop being so far away please.” Fuck she loves him. She rolls her eyes and walks towards him, watching as his eyebrows furrow.

“When did you last eat? MJ you look starving.”

“You don’t look too hot yourself, Parker.”

“That’s not - that’s not what I mean. You look beautiful, you always do.” he blushes when he hears May and goodness knows how many Avengers ‘awww’ behind her. Honestly, is a door too much to ask for? 

“Nerd.” she replies and she would be blushing if she could. She knows he knows that. 

“Tony, please can you get some O-Neg and a straw.” he says as if he’s asking for French fries. Tony immediately goes to walk out of the room as Peter shouts, “Metal straw! Please.”

He must see the nervousness that she’s trying to hide because he starts rambling about all the weird and wonderful things about him, “you know I can climb walls right? Drinking blood isn’t even that cool MJ. I mean, I can you know - do stuff.” She rolls her eyes again for good measure and something shifts. The burning behind her eyes that she’s been deftly trying to keep inside is threatening to break.

“You’re okay,” she says, touching his hand. He looks like he wants to grab it but doesn’t. She wishes he would. But she knows that’s not fair, knows she pushed him away. So she takes a deep breath, trying to ignore the celebrities behind her, seriously, get a clue, and lowers the hospital bed bar, climbing into bed next to him. She moves around a bit until she’s comfy, head resting on chest, leg thrown over his. She feels safe here, she always does with him. 

“You’re here,” he says hugging her tight to his chest, resting his lips on her forehead but not actually kissing her. 

“Is that okay?”

“Yeah, Em, of course. Are you -” he lowers his voice because everyone is just lingering at the end of the room, honestly is she being punk’d? “-are you just erm, here to make sure I’m alive? Or are you here-” he takes a deep breath, pulling back to look at her properly. 

“Michelle,” he says with such emotion it hits her square in the chest. “I love you. I love you so much, and if you don’t want to turn me that’s fine, it’s okay. I still want to be with you. For as long as you’ll have me. I want a life with you. I want - I want you. That’s all I want.” 

“Pete-” she sees his face fall even though he’s trying his hardest not to. Like he’s doing his best to make this easier for her, and it makes her chest hurt “-what about your family? What would they think?”

“May already loves you, I talk about you all of the time.”

“It’s true.” she hears May shout from the other end of the room. She whips her head around and is unsurprised to see a gaggle of people just chilling at the end of the room. 

“If you looked at his laptop history you’d just see variations of ‘hey google, where to take someone on a date at nighttime when they don’t eat’” Tony Stark says, returning with a blood bag, in what isn’t a bad mimic of Peter’s voice. 

“Guys,” Peter says, half whine half annoyed. “Please can you give us a moment?” There are choruses of ‘oh yeah’ and ‘sure’ as they move out of the room. 

“Sorry about them, boundaries are not something they’re used too.”

“They care about you, it’s nice.”

“Yeah, they’re great.”

“You’ll forget-” she looks at him, hopes he understands “-you’ll forget about them if you change. Not straight away. You’ll get to see them grow old, and then they’re gone. Everyone you knew is gone. And it’ll happen in stages, slowly and you won’t even realise. And then one day you wake up and you can’t remember what they sound like, or what their phone number was, or what they look like. I can’t ask you to do that. It hurts too much.”

“You’re not asking me, Michelle,” he says, borderline pleading. “I’m asking you. I love you. I choose you. This isn’t something I thought about on a whim, I’ve spoken to May, Tony, Ned, literally ask anyone here. I want to spend the rest of forever with you. I’d follow you anywhere.”

“What are you scared of?” he asks, spinning onto his side so they are face to face. One hand under her waist and one lightly stroking her neck. 

“What if you change your mind and it’s too late? I can’t deal with knowing you exist but you hate me. You won’t be able to be Spiderman anymore, at least I think so? I don’t know. We’ve barely been together a year Pete, imagine if I asked you to marry me-”

“Yes.”

“Peter,” she says with false annoyance.

“I’d marry you in a heartbeat, Michelle. You’re it for me. I knew that the second you winked at me in the bar, the second you shyly told me I’d have to invite you in. I’ve been in love with you since that night, and I want the chance to love you forever. I can deal with 70 years though if you don’t want this. It’s okay. There’s no pressure, whatever you want. It’s disrespectful of me to assume you haven’t had these thoughts before. I know -I know there has to have been other people who love so -”

“Not the way I love you.”

“Em,” he says eyes watering. She shifts her eyes to her hands, thankful that everyone finally left. 

“I’ve never wanted someone forever before. I do, want it with you though.” she chances a look up at him and she sees everything she’s ever wanted in his eyes. She hasn’t had a heart in almost 700 years but she’d give it to him if she could. She would have in the bar the first night. Would have a thousand times over since then.

She’s spent most of her vampire life so angry at the world, and seeing the destruction, feeling the hate. Being so weighed down by the fact that she had to lose everyone she ever loved, that she stopped seeing the good things, stopped trying to fall in love. But as luck would have it, she met Peter. Who is the best person she’s ever known, who brings out the best in her. She decided on the first night that she’d love him for as long as he’d let her. Knowing that it wouldn’t be enough.

Forever is a time you can’t quantify, it’s scary and it’s lonely. But as she looks up at him, knowing for as much as she loves him she can barely find the words to describe it, she realises this is what life is. It’s finding people who love you, people who would die for you, people who have your back. And suddenly, forever barely seems long enough. 

As he leans in to kiss her, eyes closing as his nose rubs hers, she thinks about all the things they could do now. Knowing he’ll want adventures, to see the world, to help as many people as they can. She’ll be content doing anything, as long as it’s with him. Maybe they’ll break up after a millennia and forget about each other. Maybe she’ll meet him again in another 659 years and it’ll be like the first time all over again. She’s not scared of the prospect, knowing that in any lifetime she’d find him, she’d choose him, she’d love him.

**Author's Note:**

> Vampire!MJ that is all. 
> 
> Happy Halloween my angels. 
> 
> Come say hi on tumblr: @i-lovethatforme


End file.
